When you come from such a tight-knit and loving family, you would naturally want to recreate that for yourself. And you'd be right, because it's always been my biggest and brightest dream. Of course, like most people, this dream originally included a partner to go on this adventure with, but I always knew that single or married, I would make it happen one way or the other.
The pivotal moment in this journey came on the afternoon my sister had her thirteen week appointment to find out whether she was having a girl or a boy. She texted me two ultrasound pictures, so I asked her, "Boy or Girl?" Her answer? "Yes." It took me a minute to grasp what she was saying, and then it hit me. Twins! We don't have any twins in our family so it was a total shock to us! But I am a Gemini, so I always wanted to be a twin and I always wanted to have twins, so it was at that very moment that I realized, at 32 years old, that it was time to buckle down, learn what I needed to learn about what my options were, and start actively working towards that dream, not just imagining it.
I’ve done my research - on surrogacy in US and Canada, on adoption, and on foster care. I have called and emailed and spoken to agencies and blogs and seminars, to friends and friends of friends who have embarked on their own journeys to parenthood. I have the full and unequivocal support of amazing friends near and far, not to mention the support of my entire family. In short, I'm an awful lucky guy, and the only thing missing is a child of my own.
Unfortunately, the costs associated with surrogacy in the States are prohibitive so the only option for me is pursue surrogacy in Canada where this process is altruistic. It is important for me to consider this unborn baby first and foremost, and that money is better spent putting this future baby through college, or for music lessons, and sports or other activities, whatever brings joy and laughter and smiles to this baby's heart and soul.
You cannot imagine the gratitude I feel toward women that decide to become a surrogate mother who so willingly offer up the greatest gift you could give. I try very hard to give back that love and support and encouragement and joy to those around me - family, friends, and strangers too! I believe it is my responsibility and obligation to show others what that feels like, and I hope to have the chance to experience the joy and miracle of parenthood myself one day too.
In my heart I know that not having a child would be my only regret in life, and I know, from the most genuine part of me, that this is what is meant for me. To raise a child in a happy, laughter-filled home, where they can grow and explore and learn. Where they can play with their cousins, uncles, and aunts. I want to be able to look into my parents' eyes and see them well up with tears of joy as mine do right now, as we exchange a glance that means so much. That this dream - that this dream has actually, finally, truly come to pass.
Thanks you so much, from the bottom of my heart, for even being willing to explore the journey of surrogacy. If you are thinking to become a surrogate, you are the kind of person that makes the world go round, who teaches others what compassion and giving and sacrifice looks and feels like. And for that, I am eternally grateful, you are a blessing no doubt!!
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